Merry Christmas!

Holiday Party at "The Home" and we (Rod and Tina) were in attendance. Santa did not disappoint as he arrived with a bag full of goodies for all the good residents. Aimee, one of the attendants, also wrapped up a gift for each of the residents. Madeline good many good laughs out of Tina's antlers and was quite taken with Santa himself. Who could resist that twinkle?

Where's Madeline?

This year Alayna got very creative and made a photo collage for the Christmas Card from Ruthaven. Can you find Madeline?

Happy Halloween

Friday, October 29th there was a Halloween Party Luncheon at the board and care facility where Madeline lives. Madeline dressed as the little devil we know she can be despite the angel she is.

The staff is always ready to make the supreme sacrifice and pony up with costumes of their own. How cute are all of them?!

Aloha!

One of the resident's sons traveled to Hawaii and sent back a care package of Hawaiian leis for all of the ladies in residence. That man just scored a load of Heaven points! The ladies loved it!

Madeline's Birthday Party

Madeline was joined by her family to celebrate the occasion of her birth. It was a wonderful time to catch up with her and allow her to bask in the love of her dear family. The cake was lovingly made by a very talented Teresa Stoutenberg.

Cinderella

Stopped by Madeline's place with a couple pair of new shoes. Madeline was happy and alert and seemed genuinely excited at the prospect of new shoes. Unfortunately, the tag in her old shoes told me a lie. They said size 10, so Rod and I bought a snazzy pair of canvas espadrilles in size 10 as well as a delightfully cushy pair of baby blue slipper shoes. Apparently her size 10's were MENS size 10. Doh! Another trip to the shoe store is in order but the experience of playing Cinderella with Madeline was priceless.

We didn't waste our visit though. We hung out in the kitchen talking with Lisa, who was cooking lasagne for dinner. We also took a stroll around the facility a half dozen times. A few of the residents were having a tough day. It is difficult to see the ladies lose their faculties and get weepy and fretful. Madeline's roommate was having a particularly difficult day and was sticking to her room. For the most part Madeline doesn't seem to take particular notice of the fretting but we talked about it and decided that it is much better to take the "Don't Worry, Be Happy" approach.

There, we've solved it all. And only in one visit. You're welcome.

Save The Date! for Madeline...

Yes, folks it is true, we are going to have a quiet little 95th Birthday Celebration for Madeline (at the nursing home). The plan is for her family to arrive Saturday, October 2, 2010 at 2:00 pm. Cake will be served.

Note: We are only scheduled for an hour in the diningroom for our festivities.

Due to space concerns, gifts are not advisable. Cut flowers in vases are permitted though plants are not.

Watch your mailboxes for the invitation...and we hope to see you there.

Rockin' Ralph Lauren

Tis the season for sales at Sears and TJ Maxx...and Madeline is getting updates to her wardrobe. We want you to know that Sag Harbor is not the only label on Aunt Mac's bod, she is rockin' Ralph Lauren. Ya know, they take such good care of her, painting her nails and accessorizing her outfits with necklaces and brooches when appropriate that we just had to upgrade her threads.

Don't worry, she's still Mom, Grandma, and Aunt Mac and she'd love a visit. See you there!

Family Game Night

Rod and I joined forces to bring a family game of Yahtzee to Mom. The nursing home has a deluxe version of Yahtzee and Madeline has grown interested in the game. She requires some cueing and gentle reminders of what she's supposed to be doing and we keep score for her but it should be known that she really gets interested and shakes up the dice in the cup as vigorously as she's able before she dumps the lot. She also roots for her desired outcome and blows into the cup for luck.

We sure had a good time playing this game with her and only quit (after 3 rounds) when they needed to set up the tables for dinner. A couple of times she looked as if she might have been uncomfortable but when we inquired she vehemently denied any ailment and wanted to keep on playing. It was really heartening and joyful to see her get interested in playing.

We encourage you to visit Madeline to play a game of Yahtzee with her. But be forewarned, she's quite lucky and has been known to roll out the Yahtzees.

Great Grandmother - A New Arrival

Madeline would like to announce that there is a new addition in her family. Ryan Keith Flink was born to William Flink and his delightful girlfriend on Thursday, July 15, 2010. As you know William is the only son of Keith & Pam Flink and Keith is the son of David and Joyce Flink, and David is Madeline's firstborn son.

Madeline was happy to hear that she has become a great grandmother and anxiously awaits the introduction of the new arrival. We have heard from a reliable source that there will be a generational photo very soon.

Rod Visits Mom

Now hear this...now hear this....Rod visited his Mother without me. (Okay, this is not really newsworthy. This is not the first time he has visited her alone. Though he is quite capable, it is just easier to find talk-worthy subjects by bouncing ideas off of each other. Remember Madeline can't always initiate nor carry conversations but she sure will join in on an engaging and interesting one.)

It was wonderful to hear that Madeline recognized him and announced that "my son showed up to visit me." Now, whether or not she recognized him as the youngest son...well, we don't know but they had a lively and upbeat conversation.

A Summer Luau

Oh My Gosh! My memory can be horrid as life gets busier! I can't believe that I missed Mom's Luau Day at the nursing home. I am so grateful that they are so very good with her. Actually I didn't miss the whole day, I just missed the actual celebration. I hear that it was a popular event and I can attest to the wonderful decorations, the happy mood, and the fact that Mom was all gussied-up in appropriate luau attire.

Again, her mood was great so I know she had a good time. I will endeavor to write her schedule of activities into my own schedule with the appropriate reminders. I would have loved to attend this event by her side. An FYI - each month there is a main attraction event scheduled although there are regularly scheduled events to keep the ladies busy and mentally engaged. I sure wish I could move in with Mom. They know how to have fun.

Talkin' Bout Dad

Rod and I dropped by to visit with Mom to find all of the ladies involved in a trivia activity. In the short time we eavesdropped, we learned that one ounce of gold (matchbook-sized) can be rolled out the size of a tennis court. It can also be made into a wire that measures 50 miles. Wow! The stuff we don't know...

We brought her out to the front room to visit privately and she was very attentive. She zeroed in on Rod and I and started talking about Dad. She gets into circular, repetitive conversations and today she was convinced that Dad had given up and thus died. She had stern warnings for Rod and myself. She spoke with conviction and kept circling back around to the subject at hand despite our steering the conversation to happier subjects of babies soon to be born and such.

Into our lives, a little seriousness should come and today was a serious day for her. Not hostile, just a talkative mood that leaned on the serious side. By the time dinner was being served she was happy to move on to that activity, releasing us to head home to prepare our own dinnertime meal. By the way, Madeline got a nice haircut this week. She's styling pretty good and still has no problems feeding herself.

FYI: There will be a Luau on July 9th. You will need to contact the nursing home, if you wish to attend. Hawaiian shirts or grass skirts are encouraged.

Bingo and Quilting

I wandered into the nursing home today to find quilts strewn all over the diningroom and all the ladies gathered in the TV room. No television watching was going on, instead a rousing game of bingo led by Lisa. Lisa would cue Madeline who would call out the numbers loud and clear while playing her own bingo card.

Word was that Madeline was pretty lucky today winning a few Bingos, one while I was there. Madeline was also very lucky with regard to gifts given this day. The owner of the home, Durrell, has a mother-in-law who quilts and gave each of the ladies her own quilt to keep. Madeline's quilt was a beauty sporting leaves. I will post a photo as soon as I receive it.

Technology - No Problem

Stopped in to see Madeline. Spent a little time in the dining room just visiting and knitting. She was in very good humor and listened in on a conversation between Alayna and I about applications for our smart phones. Madeline nodded at all the appropriate times to make us believe that she was following our conversation about complicated technology. She is such a joy.

We were laughing in this photo because one of the aides prompted Madeline to say "I love stinky feet!". It just broke us up!

Happy - Just not many photos

I know. Not many posts with pictures. I've been forgetting to bring along my camera to capture those special moments. I will work on it. Just know that Madeline is doing well. Very healthy and happy in her home.

Frankie Say Relax

I'm sittin' there mindin' my own business when I am accosted by none other than....Frankie...the mascot at Madeline's nursing home. I guess he thought I was makin' it for him. Poor Frankie, this one's not for you.

Happy Mother's Day

We arrived to take Madeline out for a Sunday drive on Mother's Day. It was such a glorious sun-shining day. We were delighted to find that Stephen and Emily had visited the day before, leaving a mother's day card and a beautiful bouquet of roses.

Today our purpose was to give Madeline a change of pace. The opportunity to feel the wind in her hair and the sunshine on her face. We also wanted her to have the chance to get some hugs from loved ones. After the attendants loaded her into the car, we headed over to David & Joyce's house where they welcomed her with love, cards, and fresh flowers from the yard.

Her delight was obvious when both David and Joyce came in for hugs. She got to see Samantha and her dog as well as Keith who stopped by. After visiting for awhile, we headed up the street to pop in on Pam. Pam's yard is in full flower and she was busily preparing Mother's Day dinner for David and Joyce but she came right out to hug and kiss Madeline.

Madeline may not know what's going on every second but she certainly responds well to the love and affection of her family. If you ever get the opportunity to stop by, we suspect you will walk away with a warm heart.

Before we took her back for her dinner, we have to admit that we probably spoiled that dinner. We introduced her to Jamba Juice where she devoured a 16-oz. Peach Perfection. Now I know what to bring her for a treat during the summer.

Honor Thy Mother

Rod and I stopped in to visit with Madeline together. We find it is easier to hold up the conversation when there is two of us talking about the day or days gone by. Madeline prefers to listen in but will join the conversation when something piques her curiosity or interest.

We are consistently amazed by how clean and fresh and cared for she is in this board and care facility. They take the time to properly groom her for the day, painting her nails periodically and they will take a tour to the community jewelry box to make sure she is glowing like the matriarch she is.

They say that dropping by care facilities at varying times gives one a good indication of how things really are. We make it a practice to change it up (though my favorite time is following lunchtime when they engage in group activities.) So much good fun!!!

Never Too Old to Laugh

Rod and I stopped by to visit Madeline today. Boy, for being one of the oldest ladies at the nursing home, I have to admit that she is by far and away one of the funnest. No wonder she's the favorite. She is so quick to smile and laugh. She may not always make sense when she tells a tale but she's a great listener.

Cosmic AT&T

The activities director greeted me as I came in to see Madeline today. She said that Madeline had mentioned that she wanted someone to come visit her today and that she was glad that I dropped by. Madeline also mentioned that people "forget" in a very non-judgmental tone.
That tugged at my heart. I was so glad that I worked in my visit before setting off to meeting Rodney for our anniversary dinner. In truth I had been thinking about her all morning long so we must've be communicating via "cosmic AT&T".

How rewarding it was to walk into the TV room and see her eyes light up when I came into the room. We rolled out of the TV room into the dining room to commence visiting. She was truly happy and so was I. Soon we were drawn into conversations with others and a game of Yahtzee was suggested. It was an intimate little game for three residents eager for distraction and what fun. It is always fun to play Yahtzee with "the Ladies". Madeline started off blowing into the Yahtzee cup for luck but soon ended up shaking and rolling the dice for herself. Activity time always follows lunch by an hour or so and I am always drawn in. What a cheerful space and a cheerfull place. Hope you have the opportunity to visit and play.

Pajama Party

It was a "Girls Night In" at the home which happened to coincide with a birthday party for Alana, our friend and resident manager. For a change...junk food was on the menu and pajamas were encouraged in the middle of the day! (Most of the residents were allowed to dress normally so as not to cause any undue confusion for those suffering dementia. How thoughtful!) But boy did the staff have a ball with being able to wear outlandish outfits. And the residents delighted in the pure joy of the festive mood of the day.

Soaking Up The Sunshine

Madeline and her fellow residents take in the sun out in the courtyard. I was sorry to miss this day but Durrell and her staff snapped a picture so we could enjoy her joy as well.

Thank you Durrell!

She Sings!

One day one of Madeline's caregivers was singing away while attending to her room. She was delighted and surprised to hear Madeline joining in with a rendition of Amazing Grace. If you're in for a visit, ask for Misty and see if "Maddy" (as they call her) is up for a song.

You may have already been aware of her sweet voice but I was completely taken by surprise. What a gift!

Madeline's Tea Party

It was a tea party at the nursing home!

There were beautiful and delicate bone china tea cups filled with a variety of teas.

Two different scones to choose from as well as Devonshire cream, lemon curd, and seedless raspberry preserves.

Liz provided "Table Talk" cards to get the conversation going. A good time was had by all.

Yahtzee!

"Come on Yahtzee!"...."Roll me a three!".... and "Another large straight!" could be heard in the cozy dining room just after lunch. Yep, it was another group activity led by the indefatigable Liz. We learned that Lou (Madeline's roommate) is very lucky and we have dubbed her "Lucky Lou". Indeed, Lou was the Champion of the Day with the high score of 254 points. Madeline was the referee and didn't miss a bit of the action at the head of the table.

Ruth is very adept at rolling small and large straights at 30 to 40 points each and she is a tough competitor. We told her that a trip to Vegas should be in her future the way she rolled big points in a single roll like she does it everyday.

Genevieve was the first to fill in the upper level scores and just missed collecting her 35 point bonus by 1 point but she thrilled us as her skill improved from barely rolling the die from the cup to taking all the dice in hand and rolling most of what she called out.

Those are the moments, folks. And these are the days. Somehow it didn't seem to matter that nobody managed to roll a Yahtzee during the whole game.

FYI: (Indefatigable - tireless, inexhaustible, or persevering)

Banana Splits

It was a beautiful day in the neighborhood. 64-degrees in February! Wow! I was out on the motorcycle and swung by Madeline's place for a visit. My timing was fabulous, they were just dishing up Banana Splits! The ladies were gathered round the big dining table with naked bowls of vanilla ice cream laid between two banana slices. They got their choice of a full-on chocolate, strawberry, and caramel strewn split (with whipped cream and a cherry on top) or any combination thereof. They could even have sprinkles!

I was offered one as well and started to politely decline when a few of the ladies decided that I needed one with everything on it. My, how they have learned me already! These ladies are so much fun. Madeline had no problems maneuvering every morsel from her bowl and chasing it down with a Shirley Temple. A few of the caretakers strolled by checking on progress and felt compelled to remind a few of the residents that they aren't supposed to eat the cherry stems. (A good idea considering the level of dementia on any given day.) They need not have reminded Madeline. She already had that one figured out and was handing the stems off to me.

Once again, it was pure delight stopping in to visit. Madeline promised to watch the movie of the day and report back to me. The movie was "Fried Green Tomatoes" and I look forward to TOWANDA! tomorrow.

Lady Bug Spring

Madeline participated in a group activity, an artistic endeavor, to signal the arrival of spring. The choice was to make a caterpillar or a string of four lady bugs. She (and all the other ladies) chose lady bugs.

The activities director, Liz, ended up with her hands full as many of the ladies decided to participate. The exercise helped them to maintain dexterity as they used paintbrushes to create their individual projects. Madeline was most interested in watching the activity and handling the end result. We named her "Supervisor" and she supplied the encouragement and laughter. I got a job helping with the activity and aided a few of the ladies with the task of painting and attaching lengths of pipe cleaner to serve as "antennae".

I tell you, this sure beats moping about the house wishing I was working. I was only stopping by after doing my shopping on my way home and ended up staying for 2 hours.

By the way, Madeline's new mattress arrived so we can all rest a little easier knowing that she is safely installed in a soft-sided mattress during the night. This type of mattress lessens the risk of her falling out of bed. The board and care facility supplied this at their expense. How great is that?! No extra charge. We continue to be amazed by the love and care lavished upon Madeline. This love and care is really paying off. The nursing assistants have been working diligently with Madeline and tell us that she is now supporting her own weight during transitions between wheelchair and bed and wheelchair and toilet. Upon her arrival, she was only capable of supporting her own weight for a maximum of about 2 seconds. This tells us that her legs are becoming stronger.

She continues to be a joy to visit. We noted a few cards beside her bedside so it looks like she is getting family visits. We can tell you that she sure perks up when family comes to see her and it seems to carry over for a few days. Thank you to those of you that take the time to stop by and say "Hello". It is very much appreciated by all (even the other residents - there are so many sweet ladies there.)

Valentine's Day

Looks like the Valentine Fairy Godmother made a personal appearance to brighten the day. Vases of red roses and carnations graced the dining tables, boxes of chocolates and candy hearts littered the countertops. Love was prevalent as family members dropped by to remember their loved ones.

You know which photo is Madeline. She may look like a sour puss in the photo but she is not. Let it be known that she is quick to smile and laugh but it's not always easy to capture it with the camera.

The Valentine Fairy Godmother was LeeAnna, one of the resident's grand-daughters, and Durrell poses with her.

She Blooms

Madeline is still settling well into her new home away from home and seems to take great delight in receiving visits from her family. This week Stephen and Emily rode over on one of the bikes around suppertime and David visited with her as well. While she doesn't know exactly when people have stopped by, she is aware that someone visited and smiles at the recollection. When she is reminded who stopped by, she says it was wonderful and beams.

Each day we continue to see improvement in her cognition and physical capabilities. While she was previously completely incontinent, she is able to participate in those most basic of activities (with attentive help). Her mood continues to be good-humored and we are told that she has taken to preferring to stay up later (around 10 pm) to watch TV in the community viewing room. Allow me to tell you that she does NOT languish in her bedroom quarters. She participates to the best of her ability in all the activities that the boarding home has to offer and what is even better is that they love her and lavish attention upon her.

As the spring approaches, flowers in the ground reach skyward in their quest to bloom. Madeline beats them to the punch...she is positively blooming these days. Please go see for yourself.

Girl's Day with Mom! Who Knew?

Madeline played BINGO today. (Okay, she was hanging onto her card and not really playing) but it was a social activity and she suited up and showed up so she gets points! I sat with her and started rattling off the happenings of my own day. I have found that she is the most awesome listener, laughs when she should and punctuates with a hearty "Darn, right!" at just the right moments with a sprinkling of "Thank God!".

To our surprise, the door opened and in stepped Liz and her good friend, Ann, bearing gifts of candy, cards, and flowers. We were all just getting settled into our visit (Liz reading a letter from Uncle Benny to Mom) when another of our impromptu posse arrived...Emily, Stephen's girlfriend!

We could not have planned it any better. This board and care facility is so wonderful, the cook, a delightful & thoughtful woman, popped some cookies into the oven and offered up coffee and beverage. It sure made a great visit, if I may say so. It is not often that just us women get together. I hope there will more visits like that one and I hope I have my camera to snap a photo.

(Just a note, Ann snapped a photo on her camera phone and if she can get it downloaded and sent out, perhaps we can post it at a later date.)

It's Groundhog's Day!

Stopped by the boarding home for what is working out to be my daily visit with Madeline. The sun was shining for all it was worth this day and I was determined to share it with her. In my mind's eye, I pictured her twelve years ago, barefoot and stooped over out her front door, contentedly picking grasses. This is the Earth Mother Madeline picture that I hold dear in my memory. It was times like these that she seemed utterly happy and within her element.

Today, we sat in the hallway in a spot where the sunlight poured in upon us, warming our bones. I chatted with her about flowers soon to be in bloom, Rod's upcoming birthday, Valentine's Day, and the fact that we would be celebrating my sister's birthday this very evening at Jimmy Mac's Roadhouse. I told her what I bought for her son, Rod, for both occasions and she laughed conspiratorially with me. Perhaps it was just polite laughter but it worked for me. It is good to see her laugh. She is so gracious during my visits and is equally gracious when it is time for me to leave. I think I see a look of appreciation and that works well for me, too.

Now, we have not heard if dear ole Mr. Groundhog saw his shadow or not (I, for one, am hoping not because I cannot bear the thought of six more weeks of winter.) But I suppose we will accept it either way.